Badass News for March

See through PSX -- Sharkey
This kicks ass. See-through colored casings will soon be available for PlayStation, from online importer NCS for $29. Colors include blue, grey green and crystal clear. Have a look at the blue one here.

Trailer "C"? -- Sharkey
Seems that the 60 minutes special on Star Wars the other day had over two minutes of new footage. TheForce.net has compiled them into a sort of "Trailer C". Go ahead and try to download it. Only two mirrors and neither are responding. Hopefully more pop up soon.

New link and Frustrated Pie -- Sharkey
Thanks to Schlyer of In Your Ear for linking to us. The other day I posted Frustrated's comments about this site, with a response from yours truly. Frustrated posted a response to this, and seems to have taken it in good humor. But I'm not the only one that responded to her comments on opinion sites. First Tyson from the White Ty Affair was mad (he got over it) and now In Your Ear has a response to her "redneck" comments in the form of a poll. Go vote now!

Robber shot by 12 year old -- Sharkey
Compton police said they have several good leads in the search for an armed holdup man involved in a fatal shooting. His partner was shot to death by a 12-year-old boy during an attempted robbery. The boy grabbed a handgun when the 16 year old robber started bitch slapping his grandmother, and put a few caps in his ass. Read more.

Rodman skips practice, sees movie -- Sharkey
Thanks to Mabs and Mox for letting me know about this. Dennis Rodman ditched practice yesterday and decided to take in a movie. He went to go see "Analyze This" at the Edward's Big Newport Cinemas. Rodman and I go way back. He called me and Wags assholes outside the Oakley factory, not to mention the various other times I've bumped into that jackass.

Fanatics -- Sharkey
Fans rioted Saturday night in anger over Michigan State's loss to Duke. The rioters started around 20 fires, overturned a car, and torched two police cars. Tear gas was used to keep the rioting jackholes in line. Quite a few injuries were reported, and probably well deserved.

Seattle cops = tards -- Sharkey
The Seattle Police Department decided to act when two employees fell out of their chairs. Employees were ordered to take a training course on how to safely sit in a chair. "Take hold of the arms and get control of the chair before sitting down," a supervisor said in a recent memo. Department safety officer Patrick Sweeney said the chair-related injuries are no laughing matter. In two cases, chairs rolled out from under employees, and a third employee hurt her back when the adjustable seat dropped abruptly. "Some people know how to sit in a chair, while others need some instruction," Sweeney said. He said he also planned to cover other common office hazards, such as open cabinet drawers.

Didn't see that one coming -- Sharkey
A Taiwanese fortuneteller got a nasty surprise when he woke up. His wife severed his penis and flushed it down a toilet after he refused to end an extramarital affair. (Reuters)

Movie Review: EDtv
Fantastic movie. Anyone who thinks that this is a ripoff of The Truman Show is dead wrong. (It is actually a sort of remake of some obscure French-Canadian film, but who gives a shit?) The acting is pretty good too. Matthew McConaughey has the perfect "dolt" act down as Ed, and Woody Harrelson plays his asshole of a brother. Jenna Elfman (scientologist...grrr..) does a good job as Ed's love intrest, and Liz Hurley's breasts are fantastic as his lust interest. I bet a lot of people say that they hate it because it's a ripoff or some bullshit about Ron Howard, but it was really entertaining. Go see it.

Bitch Pie? -- Sharkey
Yes! Someone doesn't like us! Frustrated.org posted up this tidbit about opinion sites like this one.

Some of the others with the exception of geeklife seemed rather pointless and juvenile, not to mention totally sexist. One was called "bad mofo" or something.

Hey, it's Bad ASS MoFo. And in case you were suggesting that the name of this site gives insight into our juvenile nature, WE didn't come up with the name. We're juvenile in our own way.

No advance ticket sales -- Mr. Mabs
StarWars.com confirmed that Lucas has decided not to sell advanced tickets for the first two weeks that the movie is in theatres. They claim that this is to deter scalpers from hogging all the tickets.

Digital projection of TPM -- Mr. Mabs
Digital projection of Star Wars: Episode I The Phantom Menace will take place on four screens beginning June 18, 1999. This will be the first public demonstration of a full-length motion picture from a major studio using digital electronic projectors in movie theatres to replace the normal film projectors. story

LA screens Star Wars early -- Sharkey
As I reported before, Lucas is screening TPM in select cities 3 days early for $500 per ticket. The latest city to be added is LA, and proceeds will go to the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS Foundation.

Idiot Drivers-- Sharkey
Gaah! WTF is with people on the road here in California? I'm driving around at 2:30AM on the freeway, and I'm going around 75. This guy up ahead of me must have been doing like 45, and his right blinker is on. I figure he's going to merge right, but he swerves, contemplates, and turns on his left blinker and tries to merge in front of me. I ease on over to the right so as not to slam into his tail, when all of the sudden he jerks back in front of me and starts swerving some more, nearly hitting another car and myself in the process. Jackhole.

Cal Ripken Sr. Died-- Sharkey
Cal Ripken Sr. died of lung cancer Thursday, he was 63 years old. Here's the story.

Star Wars Pics! -- Sharkey
Snaked these new Ep.1 screens from Videogames.com

     

Star Wars Games! -- Sharkey
There are two Star Wars EP1 games in production now. Both will be released on May 24th. One is a 4 player racing game (pod races) for the PC and N64, and the other is a Jedi Knight style game for the Playstation and PC. Head on over to Videogames.com for the full story (and lot's of pics).

Lucas controls everything -- Sharkey 
Lucas and Fox sent out a message to movie theatres across California, which basically told them that Matinee times would be changing. NOW. And of course, the theatres all cave. Matinee times now end at 5:15 across this state, thanks to Lucas. Why the hell is he doing this? More money for TPM one would assume. Mr Mabs let me in on this slight abuse of power today.

Old Navy can bite me -- Sharkey
You know, I remember when commercials had to be GOOD to get you to buy shit. Now I guess you just have to include an EXCRUCIATINGLY lame song and some has been actors to spell success. This seems to be Old Navy's entire marketing strategy, because I can't watch one damn show without seeing their shitty commercial for those lame drawstring shorts!! Bastards.

Gates' book reviewed -- Sharkey
ZDNet reviewed Bill Gates' new book "Business @ the speed of thought". The verdict: CRAP. Read the full article here.

Lock, Stock, and 2 Smokin' barrels -- Sharkey
Go see this movie NOW. One of the funniest movies I've seen in a long time. Unfortunately not playing in too many theatres near you, so find out where it is and go see it!

Sticky? -- Sharkey
Sticky from Sticky Zone sent me an e-mail, so I decided to check his site out. Looks promising, needs more content (like I should talk) but funny.

Emulation News -- Sharkey
Sadly, Jim Pragit's site EmuNews will be shutting down. Jim says he was offered a programming job, and can no longer update his site. EmuNews was the first emulation news site I read, and have been loyal to it ever since. Good luck Jim.
Also, the public beta of Bleem! was released yesterday. Kick ass Playstation emulator with VERY minimal system requirements. I can't wait to see the full version. Head over to the Bleem! site to download it.

"Ender's Game" the movie -- Sharkey
Orson Scott Card's award winning novel "Ender's Game" will be made into a movie! Currently Jake Lloyd (Star Wars) is top choice for the main character Ender Wiggins. I suggest that anyone who hasn't read this book to do so. It's an excellent sci-fi novel.

Lego Pie -- Sharkey
This kicks ass. Picture taken at Legoland. Thanks to In Your Ear for the photo.

John Williams score -- Sharkey
Aint-it-cool has posted that the new Star Wars score should be released on May 4th. Man, I pray it's up to his usual standard.

PIII only websites? -- Sharkey
Intel is working to make not only PIII optimized sites, but PIII ONLY sites. What a load of crap. The PIII is one of their lamest chips yet, and the damn Processor Serial Number just makes it worse! People won't stand for this crap. Read more

Help -- Mr. Mabs and Sharkey
Calling all BadassMoFos! We need your help in compiling the top 101 badass movies of all time. Please send all submissions to Mr. Mabs. Why 101? Cause it's a big fuckin' number. Why not 1001? That's TOO fuckin' big. Why not 69? Uhh...good question. Yes, we sound like twelve year olds, but then again our mental processes are pretty much stuck at twelve.

Marilyn Manson is a pussy -- Mr. Mabs
Reported in the LA Times: After spraining his ankle in a show at the Great Western Forum (Have to plug them a-holes) the LA Kings medical staff were rushed to treat Marilyn Manson's ankle. Whiny little bitch. He was later seen blowing kisses towards his Key Lime fiancee' Rose McGowan at another show. BadassMoFos do NOT blow kisses to anyone in public. PERIOD. What a bag of hairy, bloody, unshaven cunt lips.

    Aww, Mabs is just pissed that he isn't doing Rose. Manson is a puss though. -- Sharkey

Idiot's reign of terror is over -- Mr. Mabs
Rejoice MTV viewers, for Jesse Camp's one year tenure as a VJ is over. No longer will we be subjected to his wanna-be Kramer hair, insipid comments and legions of junior high kid fans. So all you top 40 listening sheep out there who want to bow to the hip-hop gods of the world sign up for the new contest. It can't get any worse. (hopefully)

Check the temperature in Hell -- Sharkey
I finally cornered Mr Mabs into a room and made him actually do an update to the site. Apologies in advance for the excess in foul language.

Miyamoto keynote speech -- Sharkey
I put up the transcript from Shigeru Miyamoto's keynote speech from the GDC. Thanks to Gurutech for the translated speech. Miyamoto, in case you didn't know, is one of the forefathers of gaming. He designed Donkey Kong, the Mario and Zelda series, and many more games I'm sure you've played.

WTF? -- Sharkey
OK, in the Irvine/Tustin area they've constructed a toll road that extends out to the 91 freeway. It conveniently has an turnoff right by my house. So this afternoon I was driving up to my house, and decided to see how the ride is and how much it costs. I get up to the tollbooth, and it's only like 25 cents. I check my pockets, don't find a quarter or change, so I say to the guy, "Sorry man, all I got is a ten." Then he flips this little sign my way that says "Exact Change Only". I say, "No, I don't HAVE exact change." Then he says "Ok, just run the light, a camera will take your picture, and they'll send you a bill for 25 cents in two weeks." The fucking check I'll write for it is worth more than a quarter to me. They've got this jackhole in the booth already, why not give him a fucking change box?

Movie Review: True Crime -- Sharkey
Not too bad, but far from perfect. Clint isn't quite the badass he used to be, yet somehow scores more in his old age. Most of the plot development is clumsy, yet blatently obvious the whole way through. The movie would have been better if it didn't draaaaag. The movie follows Clint's 12 hour quest to prove a convited murderer's innocence. All of the characters seem secondary to Clint's character development, and you don't really care about him. Dennis Leary plays his weak editor, and weak is not Dennis Leary. I want to see him rant and rave dammit. The movie's climax is far too predictable, because they try to foreshadow every single little detail. See it if you like Clint or are opposed to the death penalty.

Quicktime crack -- Sharkey
Hey, anyone who downloaded the TPM trailer notices the ever-helpful "Upgrade now or later" window, so here's a registration key generator for Quicktime Plus. I don't encourage you to break the law in any way, it's just here for educational purposes, right? Right.

Got $500 bucks to see TPM? -- Sharkey
George Lucas will debut Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace in Denver and five other cities on Sunday, May 16-three days before the rest of the U.S. If you have $500, you can get in. All proceeds go to local charities.

Trailer theives make bank -- Sharkey
I don't know if anyone else looks at eBay, but there have been plenty of stolen items up for bid since they first came out. Now Lucasfilm is finally trying to put a stop to it. eBay has been shutting down these auctions, but a few have slipped through the cracks. Two "B" trailers were sold for $360 apiece. One "A" trailer even made it up to $405.

N2000 -- Sharkey
Nintendo has confirmed that it will be releasing a new system in or around 2001 called N2000. It will be a 128-bit system w/a 400 Mhz port and dual chip design (like N64, but faster). It's rumored to support up to 20 million polygons per second. Read the IGN article here.

Kick Ass -- Sharkey
I finally downloaded countingdown's South Park:The Little Menace. It kicks much ass. I recommend it highly. If Mr. Mabs or Mox are reading, get it.(But be warned: it's 14 Megs) Grab it here

IE 5.0 -- Sharkey
I am downloading it now, I'll let you all know what I think of it.

Vacation -- Sharkey
Tomorrow I leave for a few days for Palm Springs. But fear not pie lovers, I'm taking my laptop with me, so expect updates from the road.

MMM...Pie -- Sharkey
The Pieclopedia is up now, but is still on the skimpy side. I plan to do more for it tonight.

Many thanks -- Sharkey
Thanks to all the sites who have linked to us.(Hear Ye!, Roosh, White Ty Affair, Wordpage 8.2) I put up a link bar on the front page (as suggested by Roosh).

Happy Saint Patricks Day -- Sharkey
Hope you all have a good Saint Patrick's Day. I, for one, will be celebrating my Irish heritage with some green beers. (Always interesting the next morning)

Intel is watching you -- Sharkey
Apparently the unique serial number is not just on the PIII chip. An Intel insider revealed that the serial number was in place on all .25 micron chips, which means that if you own a PII, Celeron, or Xeon, you probably have the chip. Read more.

PS2 with Netplay? -- Sharkey
God loves us. Sony has ensured that the Playstation 2 will have net support. That means Netplay baby. Read about it.

Tard Drivers -- Sharkey
Miserable sons of bitches. First off, I'm doing doing about 75 and so is the lady next to me. I notice she's swerving a little bit, then she cuts halfway in front of me, then swerves back. I speed up and look, and she's on the fucking phone. So I swerve in front of the bitch and speed up, and I can see her bitch ass swerving behind me! If you can't drive while on the phone, hang the fuck up.
Secondly, this old geezer in a damn Caddy cuts me off while doing about twenty, forcing me to slam on my brakes to avoid immenent death. Then I swerve around when I'm able, and try to zoom ahead so I can hurry and get my fucking dinner. Then I look over and HES ON THE DAMN PHONE! I'm getting a car mounted machine gun.

Pieclopedia is up -- Sharkey
Finished the Pieclopedia today. Have a look at it here.

Tard sues God -- Sharkey
There's no quicker way to book yourself a seat in Hell than to sue the almighty. Take a look. Thanks to GL.

Pieclopedia on it's way -- Sharkey
That's right kiddies, we here at BadassMoFo are compiling the only encyclopedia that matters: the Pieclopedia™. This will detail the pie and it's many lovely varieties. Look for it tomorrow.

Sharkey's Car Quest™ is over -- Sharkey
Sorry for the lack of updates yesterday, I was out getting my car. Bought me a 96' Civic EX. I sold my old 85' Celica for a grand the other day. The new car kicks much ass. Suddenly a new world of speed has been opened with the V-Tech engine. Let's just hope I don't end up getting another ticket.

Claim Jumper employees on crack -- Sharkey
Ate at the Claim Jumper tonight. Normally it's one of my favorite restaurants, but something was a bit off tonight. Before we even ordered our food, this waiter comes up and goes "OK, who had the Cheese Soup?". We look blankly at him and say, "Uhh...wrong table". He apologizes, and walks away. Normally I wouldve let that slide, but it just kept happening. And just when I thought my food should arrive, a waitress comes up and puts a plate of meatloaf in front of me. DAMMIT! Wrong table again. It happened like three times! Crack smokin' tards.

Murder in Irvine -- Sharkey
Mr.Mabs told me that someone in his neighborhood was murdered hitman style the other day. I guess that fills Irvine's annual quota for murders. He didn't go into much detail, so perhaps he will grace us with a few words on what happened? Actually, it's the weekend, so alcohol and inebriation are immenent. Translation = don't hold your breath.

Star Wars Trailer B: BadASS! -- Sharkey
Saw the trailer numerous times today on a screen bigger than you probably will and a sound system that shook the theatre windows outside. All I can say is: KICK ASS! I think I'm in love with Natalie Portman. (Actually I was already, but even moreso now) She is one of the finest slices of pie I've seen yet.

More things I hate -- Sharkey
Going to the car repair shop and waiting for hours. I had to get my car smog checked today (I'm selling it), and I was bounced all over town to other Smog stations. Every fucking time they would waste a half hour of my damn time before giving me my keys back and spouting off something about not being able to test it. WTF?!? None of them were able to give me an intelligible reason why not, until the third time. The lady there said that the car needed to be taken to a "Test Only" center. She also added, "Your car won't pass anyway, so you might as well have us fix it up first." So I asked her what was wrong. She says, "Oh, you know, vacuum hoses and whatnot." GOTCHA BITCH! I HAD THEM REPLACED MONTHS AGO!!! I told her to fuck off, and passed the smog test. HA! Think you can  pull one over on a BadassMoFo? Think again.

Slightly enhanced for your pleasure -- Sharkey
As you can see, I've slightly altered the sites visuals for you. Hope you enjoy them.

Spreading the good word -- Sharkey
Looks like we here at BadassMoFo are contagious. I've been spreading the good word of pie for years, and now, the insanely good food chain Fatburger™ has endorsed it with these buttons which all employees are required to wear.

That button sums up life in general. Ahh....Pie. We got lots of it here in O.C., which is proof positive of God's love for us.

Nevermind -- Sharkey
Oops, guess Countingdown.com isn't going to be posting the second Star Wars trailer until Starwars.com does. Guess we'll just have to wait.

Star Wars: MAY 19TH! -- Sharkey
Well, apparently the new trailer's big surprise is the release date at the end. The date has been changed from May 21st to May 19th! Countingdown.com has been hinting that they will have the trailer available to download later today, although traffic due to this news has made it near impossible to get in.

Star Wars Legos -- Sharkey
I just saw the commercial for the Star Wars Legos, and they KICK ASS! I hope they have a big display of them at Legoland™ when it opens. Check out the legos at this site.

Stanley Kubrick passes away -- Sharkey
Stanley Kubrick, director of 2001, A Space Oddysee, Clockwork Orange, and Full Metal Jacket,passed away this weekend. Thanks to theforce.net.

Cable Modems go Retail -- Sharkey
Cable modems are going to be appearing on shelves at a store near you. Hope this drives down the cost. Read about it.

Microsoft: Sneaky Bastards -- Sharkey
Well, screw the P3 identifier chip, MS has been doing far more right under your nose. Seems the registration wizard from Windows 98 takes personal information from Word, Excel, etc. and ships it off to Microsoft. Then they know who you are and specific info about your computer and files. Read more here.

Movies Reviewed -- Sharkey
Cruel Intentions
Mmmmm....Sarah Michelle Gellar.....Reese Witherspoon. Even the other chick in the movie is hot. It's like Mabs said, as soon as she makes out with Buffy, she's suddenly hot. Anyway, the movie itself is pretty good. The plot revolves around two rich kids (Gellar and Phillipe) who manipulate people into giving them what they want (SEX).

Office Space
If you've ever worked in a cubicle, see this movie. It perfectly illustrates what every one of us wanted to do, and why. And Jennifer Aniston is still a dutch apple. I recommend this movie highly. 

Commie geeks attack -- Sharkey
Well, the Pentagon can't seem to keep the commies from cracking our systems. Some say that they could be getting help from people on the inside. The Red Scare ain't over folks, them red bastards are all over. Read More

Tard pilot cleared -- Sharkey
A Marine pilot flew his jet through a cable car on a ski lift a year ago, and was cleared of all charges today. I want to know what he was flying. All I can say is, it's his own fault for not being a badass pilot.You pretend to be Maverick when you're Goose, somebody is going to eat canopy.  Read all about it.

Not much to say -- Sharkey
There's really not too much happening right now. When that happens, I start displaying my supreme powers. So hear this, Kurt Russell is not allowed to make movies anymore, and Everlast is not allowed to make music anymore. Whine all you want guys, but if I hear any more "What it's like" or see another "Escape from..." movie, then you start losng fingers. It's that simple.

Monica -- Sharkey
I'm pissed that I watch TV and still have to look at her face.

Playstation 2: BAD ASS -- Sharkey
Sony unveiled the highly anticipated Playstation 2 at a developers conference on Tuesday, and the specs are better than we could have hoped. They've been debating all this time whether to go with DVD or CD format, and finally decided on: BOTH! DVD with a built in MPEG-2 decoder so you can watch DVD movies! That's not all, the biggest applause came for the announcement that the PS2 will be backwards compatible. (For you lamens, that means you can play Playstation 1 games on the Playstation 2). For all the tech specs, click here.

Spider Man: FINALLY! -- Sharkey
After years of legal hassle, Marvel has announced that the Spidey movie is on it's way. I hope that they are able to woo James Cameron back into the writing/directing role. Check out the full story here.

Old News for February