We Were All Sick 5-Year-Old Dickheads Once…

Stuart Little's cousin Ike liked to get shit faced and cruise for bitches in his Tycho...[ Police Investigate Hamster Driving Toy Car ]

British detectives are investigating the mystery of a hamster found driving a toy racing car along a promenade at a northern seaside resort, newspapers said on Saturday.

The hamster, nicknamed Speedy, was handed in by a member of the public who found him cruising through Cleveleys, near Blackpool in the modified toy, which he powered by a treadmill.

“In the center is a typical hamster wheel you can buy at any pet shop… As the hamster went round and round it powered the car along at high speed.”

Show of hands, quick show of hands here. Who in the class has not ever tried to modify an animal or electrical device by attaching one to the other? And it doesn’t count if you didn’t own a pet. And if you were the shitheel next door who tortured someone else’s animals, you can kiss my ass. Buy your own dog, you twisted little bastard. What you did was for the purposes of evil. What I did was for the purpose of science. And Rover was the Beeker to my Bunson Honeydew.

No, there wasn’t much of a point to this post. I just wanted to share that picture of a hamster in a racecar. Why? Why the Hell not, you commie?

Categorized as News

By Sharkey

I run bamf.

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