Yes We Cannibal

by on September 3, 2009 @ 9:02 am

I didn’t think that “health care reform” would bring out the Gollum in people, but apparently it has.

California authorities say a clash between opponents and supporters of health care reform ended with one man biting off another man’s finger.

Ventura County Sheriff‘s Capt. Frank O’Hanlon says about 100 people demonstrating in favor of health care reforms rallied Wednesday night on a street corner. One protester walked across the street to confront about 25 counter-demonstrators.

O’Hanlon says the man got into an argument and fist fight, during which he bit off the left pinky of a 65-year-old man who opposed health care reform.

A hospital spokeswoman says the man lost half the finger, but doctors reattached it and he was sent home the same night.

Stay classy leftards.

Headline of the Year

by on August 16, 2009 @ 11:59 am

Swedish Lesbians Suck Sperm Banks Dry

Sweden’s fertility clinics are racking up a serious backlog of people waiting for artificial insemination, due in part to a “spike” in demand from lesbian couples for vital supplies of man juice.

So bad have things got that prospective customers at Sahlgrenska University Hospital in Gothenburg are now forced to wait 18 months for treatment.

Those guys at the Register are always good for a laugh.

Stoner Stimulus

by on August 14, 2009 @ 10:06 am

In the last year or so, I’ve seen close to 1000 ads for different medical weed spots crop up in just OC and LA counties. With Obama saying basically that he won’t bother with potheads, these shops have been popping up with more frequency than Starbucks or McDonalds. That said, it looks like someone is capitalizing on the new basically legalized weed production in SoCal in what I tend to refer to as Stoner Stimulus:

Residents of Newport Beach, Costa Mesa and Huntington Beach will reap the rewards of late-night delivery that will last until 3 a.m. Sunday-Thursday and 5 a.m. on Friday and Saturday.

Beginning tonight, Midnight Muncheez will sell sandwiches (”fat” sandwiches, says co-owner Jared Jones, pictured left) with such fillings as pastrami, turkey, meatballs and roast beef. They’ll be available hot or cold for about $7.

There’s also a king-size hot dog with a smattering of toppings that can be ordered.

The real highlight, which Jones said is expected to launch Aug. 21, is the 14-inch pizza, eight slices per pie, that will cost $11.99. Each topping will cost $1 and there’s a normal selection of meats and veggies to choose from.

The idea is that not everybody drinks late into the night, but even non-drinkers have to eat, Jones said.

I remember during the dotcom boom sites like Cosmo and PinkDot would deliver pretty much anything at any time. This idea sounds like a pretty good one for wacked out people who shouldnt be making a taco bell run at 4 am.

Keep this in mind

by on August 11, 2009 @ 10:40 am

the next time some stupid asshole says that “children are the future”


Full video coverage from the 10th Annual Gathering of the Juggalo’s here The MOAB was created for events such as this. Seriously, wtf is wrong with these people. At least you expect a certain level of mental deficiency at a Jerrys kids show, but this appears to be just a gathering of the worst forms of white trash from New Jersey to Texas. Burning Man at least has hot chicks naked.

Remember, these are the people Obama wants to waste your taxdollars on for medical coverage.

You’re doing it wrong

by on @ 7:35 am

Batchelor Parties usually should not involve anal rape

When the man, who was on all fours and naked from the knees up, asked her not to go near his anus, she allegedly said: ‘‘Not a problem. Relax. It’s only fun. I won’t go there.’

But Mr Gilligan said that soon after Naggs applied cream or lubricant to his buttocks, he felt a sharp pain, a thrust and the dildo ‘‘go right into his anal passage’’.

He said the man was hurt and shocked and after Naggs allegedly told him not to worry because ‘‘only you and I know’’, he said: ‘‘What the f— did you do that for, you stupid bitch.’’

One made of pink, right in the stink.

If you look like this guy in Japan

by on July 23, 2009 @ 1:20 pm

Then this is probably the only ass you’re going to be getting:


Nisan didn’t mean to fall in love with Nemutan. Their first encounter — at a comic-book convention that Nisan’s gaming friends dragged him to in Tokyo — was serendipitous. Nisan was wandering aimlessly around the crowded exhibition hall when he suddenly found himself staring into Nemutan’s bright blue eyes. In the beginning, they were just friends. Then, when Nisan got his driver’s license a few months later, he invited Nemutan for a ride around town in his beat-up Toyota. They went to a beach, not far from the home he shares with his parents in a suburb of Tokyo. It was the first of many road trips they would take together. As they got to know each other, they traveled hundreds of miles west — to Kyoto, Osaka and Nara, sleeping in his car or crashing on friends’ couches to save money. They took touristy pictures under cherry trees, frolicked like children on merry-go-rounds and slurped noodles on street corners. Now, after three years together, they are virtually inseparable. “I’ve experienced so many amazing things because of her,” Nisan told me, rubbing Nemutan’s leg warmly. “She has really changed my life.”

Uh yeah buddy we are believing this story.

Seriously, Japan scares me. We nuked them twice and all it appears to have done is made them even more deranged.