weak sauce

by on June 19, 2007 @ 3:59 pm

I am mutha fucking pissed. So I order a TV online. WRONG thing to fricken do. Take my time from work to receive it from the freight carriers, get the puppy halfway mounted and cable guys out to hook it up and what happens???? A fucking line right down the fucking middle of the screen. Alright the, contact Amazon and email them like they say. Said I want a refund and you can have this picked up. Civil, polite and short. Nooo get an email back asking me to contact the manufacturer to see if they can fix it or trouble shoot…
At first I was like- These people are great! Now they can lick my asshole after eating spicey greasy cheap pizza. So I call Sharp, they ask me to email a picture of the problem, done while I was on the phone with them. They say they’ll contact me within 48 hours to figure out the best approach after talking to the tech guys. No call back and I was busy for a week so no sweat off my sack. I call back asking what the deal was since no one called.
They tell me they have it in their notes that someone did try and call me for pics… I tell them I sent them in when I was on the phone with them a week ago. Oh hey, look at that… they DID have the pics. Well shit howdy! I get the we’ll contact a service technician in your area and have them contact you for a time to schedule coming out. Day goes by no call. Next day I call Sharp again, still being polite and impatient.

Hi There! Haven’t heard from you guys, was wondering why a service tech hasn’t called to set up the appt.
Oh let’s look in your file, yup yup, we didn’t get the pics…oh wait yeah we did. Let me transfer you. Hold please.

Well holy shit I’m getting a little miffed to say the least. A service tech will call you, I tried calling but they’re not open yet. Here’s the number for you to follow up with them if you don’t get a call. Fucking lovely customer service you cock gobblers.

On to the next day- no call so I call the techs. Who… guess what!?!? Haven’t gotten the work order!! Back to Sharp.. they haven’t gotten a work order, get it there. Hold please.

Im about to flip myh lid when the lady gets back on the phone and says she had the head tech guy look at the pictures and he says it’ll take blah blah part to fix it and they’re gonna overnite it so I can have it fixed right away.

Well kids, that was last Friday. It’s Tuesday and I had made an appt for then tech people to come out today from 4-6. Guess what call I got leaving work to get home in time? BINGO! Your part isn’t here, we’ll call tomorrow to find out where it is.

I called Sharp cuz it wasn’t the little asian lady with the thick accent I couldn’t really understand english’s fault. And wouldn’t ya know it, that particular department had left for the day already. Poor Nick got an aggravated Peach.

Here comes the obvious questions to Nick, Mr. Customer Service.

“Do your parts usually take this long?
Is your company’s customer service always this lacking? What would you do if you were me? Perhaps demand a refund from Amazon? So maybe I could get a TV that works properly? Would you think that paying over 2 grand on a TV you’d get some customer service help?”
“Im sorry Ma’am, I unfortunately can’t answer those questions but no we don’t usually back order these parts. Is there anything I can help you with?”

GEE! Maybe by getting my TV FIXED?!?!?! But I wasn’t gonna yell at this kid, the sarcastic ass questions were bad enough.

“Nope, I’ll just call Amazon and deal with them now. DICK” *click*
Dear Amazon-
Hello- I had a damaged good when it arrived and had asked for a refund. You had sent an email asking me to contact the manufacturer. They have been no help and Im fed up. Please either refund my money and pick this junk up or get Sharp to fix this before I break it beyond repair. You’d think I could get some real customer service for buying something over 2 grand.

Short story long, fuck Sharp.

this ain’t no Japanese box with a microphone

by on @ 2:51 pm

I am a desk jockey- for the most part. I sit at my desk and my comfort in the rat race of white collars are my speakers. They bring me my soothing tunes and angry tunes and happy tunes. Don’t know bout you ass clowns but I have to have music. HAVE to. Well what really chaps my hide is when the fuckfaced goon next to you decides it karaoke time. Busting out singing along and completely out of tune. MY music coming out of MY speakers at a fairly low volume does not need to be sung completely off key. Who the fuck do they think they are? No one here is shitfaced, ok, granted Im a little stoned but that is all the more reason why some jerk off shouldn’t sing to my music. Who’s it sung by bitch? Red Hot Chili Peppers not a douche ass clown.

Off the fucking hook today

by on April 12, 2006 @ 9:52 am

Wanna rip it apart! Ever in a fucking mood where you’ve just been working your hands to the bone, you’ve got the fresh reviving burst of energy from being single again and you want to rip the world apart, chew it up, spit it out all over yourself and rub it on you like jello? Luckily Im not a guy cuz I’d just be in the mood to buy a $5 hooker and fucker her til she was left bleeding all over the bed as I split her apart.And lucky for you I can’t upload my song that’s been running a rampage in my head for 2 fucking WEEKS, this song make me want to hop on a go go box!!!

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I dig it- by dirty sanchez